Then there was living with my mom’s ex best friend… that was a living nightmare. Every night I would hope for some way to escape. I would wish that someone would take me away from this place. There were a lot of things that happened there that are absolutely beyond …
The next major event that I remember was my mom not really being there for me. At the time, my mother was undiagnosed for bipolar. She was medicating how worked best for her at the time. While I understand that, it also meant that I had to step up and …
Since I’m enjoying feeling less encumbered from having done a lot of work on dealing with my rape, I figured maybe I should tackle the bigger and scarier monster in my closet. This is one that I wish that I didn’t have, let alone have the need to kill it …
Life hasn’t been very generous to me as of late. Then again, how often is life generous to anyone? At this point there are plenty of instances that make me question many things… and to a degree I feel myself occasionally dipping into despair. While I wish I could say …
Since I seem to be having huge issues with insomnia as of late (not too terribly surprising), I figured that I would write out things since my brain is keeping me awake (I’ve been up since 3:30). And every time I try to sleep, it feels like a have a …
Nights are getting rough… and I’m not really sure why. Why is all of this being really heavily triggered. Why is my feeling of isolation so strong? Why does my heart feel so heavy? What the fuck is going on that I feel so damn depressed? This is bugging the …
I don’t often cite Family Guy as a source for deeper thought. I mean, come on, it’s not exactly a bastion of good lessons or real thought. It’s mostly base and crass humor. Occasionally they have some great episodes, or parts that are poignant… sometimes they hit close to home. …
I’ve been thinking as of late… about things I probably shouldn’t be. I’ve stayed too long in the dark recesses of my brain. I wish that I didn’t necessary feel the need to do so, but sometimes that’s just how it goes. I’ve been talking, as of late, of confronting …
What is happening right now? Well… Life is interesting now. Not fun, just interesting. Last week I was triggered by one of my partners. This wasn’t an intentional triggering. It did trigger me all the same. So, now I get to deal with a lot of the issues that come …
Once again, I find myself in a triggered state… where all I can do is feel lousy. It’s not something I can do much about. I was triggered, now I need to work my way out of it. Of course this isn’t going to be short work, because it never …
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